on the verge

of something. Not sure what. I want to workout and walk right now. Not odd normally, but it is a feeling I have to my core, movement, escape. I want to make my body move and feel the soreness from a good workout. I feel on the verge of an emotional outbreak, crying or screaming, laughing or singing, I am not sure which.

No, this is not a pity party post. It is more of an observation for me to look back later once this passes over. Maybe it has to do with Mercury - I don't know. That should be better on the 12th.

My normal quiet work environment has me listening to music, and Sarah at that. This could be good or bad. Sarah has helped me through so much. I can tell you what emotional hell I was going through with each album. This is something I crave when I need to work through something - not always bad. At work lately if I listen to anything it has been Venus Hum, Coco, or something else mood lifting and silly.

It is probably the crazy amount of rain we have had combined with needing to study/work and wanting to feel in control of something - SHHH universe you did not hear me, I am not trying to control, I just want the illusion of control. I think that is why I am doing good with my diet and exercise - please note I did not say losing weight, I know that is out of my power - but the actions are mine and I own them.