at work

I am at work. I am functioning. It is hard. I just want to sit and cry. BestFriend won't allow it. She is wonderful. She is giving me my space and not yelling at me for breaking our plans two days in a row. She is having me focus on studying and walking. I hope it works. I just want to feel normal again. I posted that I feel healthier and that is true. But I am still feeling out of sorts from the procedure. Nothing bad, but it just takes time. I feel tired. I just want to be able to do everything that I want to. A physical healing time from all of this seems absurd to me. Shouldn't the emotional be enough.

I was having a rough time last night and Bug came up to me and told me "I need my mommy". It was the most perfect thing for her to say. I told her that I need my Bug. I am keeping her close to me. She is amazing and helping me through all of this.

And as much as I want to start walking now, I don't know if I am ready yet. Perhaps this week I should simply focus on the house.

Oh and did I mention Blah?