Friday, December 15, 2006

all over the place

blah. Today I am feeling some sadness. Ugh. Some of it started yesterday when I picked Bug up from school. A teacher said "I know better than to get between Bug and her graham crackers". Another teacher misheard and said "oh is there a problem with Grandpa". I asked the first teacher if she said graham crackers - she confirmed. Second teacher then says "he picked her up yesterday, right?" I said no. She asked if it was earlier in the week. I said no. She said "ever?" I said no. That is when it truly hit me that Bug does not have any grandpas. Well, she has a Great-Grandpa and that is neat, but not the same. It made me sad.

Life. I don't understand it. This morning I found out about a 5 year old boy at our church who passed away. Not fair at all. Mom is working the funeral tomorrow. She is blah today too because of it. Makes me want to hug my Bug.

Today I am not focused at work. I have a deadline and I am not into it. I want to go home. Tonight is Bug's school's party and then the Trail of Lights. Good thing is that it should be nice weather.

And then tomorrow night. That is going to be the big one. Sweetie and my third annual Christmas Date. We will eat good food and watch the Nutcracker. I am excited. Hopefully it will get me out of my funk.

Wednesday night Sweetie and I went on a Duck Tour with Sweetie's department. It was a lot of fun. I will have to post some pictures. If you want to learn about Austin, don't do it. If you want to quack at strangers, go for it.

Tonight, with the lights, tomorrow the Nutcracker, Sunday finishing all shopping, Monday is gymnastics, Tuesday is Santa, Wednesday and Thursday are watching Christmas movies until we lose our minds, Friday is a Diva gathering, Saturday is Christmas Eve Eve, Sunday is Christmas Eve, and then Monday is Christmas. Tonight really starts the Christmas rush.

I love this time of year, it is my favorite. I am going to work on something. I am going to work on staying positive, choosing happiness. All in the mind - right? All in our choices. We shall see if this works.

That and walking. Much like SIL#1 - going to start calling brother's wife SIL#1 and Sweetie's sister SIL#2 to avoid confusion. Not a ranking, this is the order that they became my SILs - she believes a midget with a taser would solve her scheduling problems. Do they come in the "make me exercise" variety? I think if I could find a way to put a treadmill in my house, I would use it most daily. It is the walking outside in the dark that gets to me. But a little zzzz would help.

My meds - I looked at my levels and it looks like the are good - gosh darnit. So I am focusing on lifestyle rather than med reduction - at least through Feb. But since I got the news, I have had the WORST time remembering to take them. I am a great morning pill taker. It is when you say I can't take one pill with others, like my antithyroid cannot be taken with my vitamin, that I forget the second pill.
** After posting this, I did further research. According to this article my lab is using the old standard for TSH levels. Which means since mine is above a 3 - according to the new standard that I am hypo. I knew it!

But my new mottos - Shit or get off the pot - we will call it SOGOTP for short. If I want my meds reduced in March, I need to exercise and eat right. OK eating right will start AFTER the holidays. I am not THAT strong. And tonight is some exercise. But I need to do it. Stop talking about it and do it. One step at a time.

Next week we have two appointments. Serif has her ENT follow up and I have my follow up with my girlie doc. Did I ever blog that my pap came back abnormal? It also came back negative for HPV - so yay, but I have to go back and have a second pap done. No big deal.

OK I realize I have written a book without saying anything. I will close for now. Everyone have a safe weekend.

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