Another Day

I have not posted much during the past week because my morning sickness has gotten worse. I am sure everyone is sick of hearing about how I feel. And I am sure when I feel like this that I come across less than happy. Do not worry, I am happy.

My morning sickness was bad all weekend. Today is no different. I am wondering how long I will last at work - just wanting to crawl into my bed. Unfortunately, I have class tonight so I cannot just go home for the rest of the day. But a small nap would be nice before my late night.

This weekend was fun. It was Violet's first b-day party. I can't believe she is a year. My Sweetie and I bought a cute ornament for our Christmas tree - it is for expecting parents with 2004.

My Sweetie has been amazing. He cleaned the fridge, did laundry, and took out the trash yesterday. He takes the best care of me.

My b-day is this week. I am excited. It is my last b-day without me being a mom. It is also the start of the holidays. I can't believe it is the second week in November. Time has gone so quickly over the last 7 weeks.

Hopefully I will start feeling better and back to my old self soon.

We are at 9 weeks now.
This is what the websites say that the baby looks like now.

Amazing Day

Yesterday was amazing. We went to our first prenatal visit. My family doctor recommended this doctor so I had never met him. I was worried that we might not like him. That is so not the case. We love him. He is amazing. He made us feel like we were his only patients and that he was genuinely happy that I was having a baby. Both my Sweetie and I liked him right from the beginning. He is also a more laid back doctor - I can have coke in moderation - like one a day.

Then the most amazing thing happened. We got our first sonogram and got to see the heartbeat. The heartbeat was what I was looking forward to. This is a good sign that the pregnancy will not miscarry. Not only did we see the heartbeat, we saw a strong and steady heartbeat. The doctor said that it is a healthy baby. My Sweetie and I both teared up when we saw it. We knew I was pregnant, but to see it - that was amazing. We got to see what we made - that our love created life. And that our life will never be the same.

Everything looks good. The doctor said we will get better pictures during the next visit. The only thing is that my uterus is tilted forward - while I am more tilted than most, I am not out of the range of normal. I think it is why I am starting to show. My weight is good. Have not gained since I found out I was pregnant - so I am technically down since getting pregnant. They also took blood for a wide variety of tests - unless something is bad, I will not get the results until our next visit on December 1st.

I told my work yesterday after the appointment. Let me just say that I told two people at one hour before I left yesterday. Almost everyone I know knew yesterday, or at least this morning. Word travels fast around here.

I am a mouse

If you ask my Sweetie, I am a mouse everyday. However, today others can see this trait. My work allowed everyone to dress up in their Halloween costumes. I am the cutest little mouse. My Sweetie even made sure to take a picture of me this morning because I look so cute.

My company had a happy hour of sorts to celebrate. We had cookies as big as yo face and apple cider. Because I was dressed up I got a kewl pen that lights up and a stress ball. Lots of fun.

Now I am ready to go home.

Wonderful Morning

I know everyone is sick of hearing me talk about being - sick. So I won't discuss it for this post.

In fact, I am doing pretty good. I slept wonderfully last night and I actually woke up hungry. Today seems more like the morning sickness that I was having before week 6 - the general sense of nausea and lack of appetite. I can handle this.

I also woke up in a great mood.

Everything in my life is changing. It is scary. The last 5.5 weeks have been crazy. I sit here rather numb, trying to take it all in. I trust in God that everything is happening for a reason. I trust that it wasn't only fertility, but fate stepping in and planting the future.

I cannot wait until Monday and our appointment. I know that my Sweetie is going to tear up. He did when we found out that I am pregnant. It is going to make it real. He is so into this whole situation. He is talking to my belly, pampering me, and is so excited to experience the whole process. I know he is going to make a wonderful father. At least that is one worry that I do not have.

My only hope for tonight is that I can get my homework complete before passing out tonight.

Same Topic Different Stop

Along the lines of my last post, I had a thought. If you consider depression gives you highs and lows on its own -much like the runaway mine train at Six Flags. Pregnancy adds hormones to this mix and all of the sudden you are on the Giant.

Right now the roller coaster is up. I am feeling a bit better. Dare I say -hungry. And my mood has lifted, which is always a plus. I have homework tonight and I need to walk. Other than that I plan to sleep and relax and sleep some more.

Rainy October Day

Last night was as bad as yesterday as far as my morning sickness. This morning is slightly better, but I still dread any movement for fear of having to run to the bathroom.

You don't know what pregnancy is like until you are in the throws of it. I always hoped that I would not have the morning sickness and that I would be happy all of the time.

Please note - I am not saying that I am unhappy with life, this baby, or anything extreme. All I am adding is that there are a lot of emotions during pregnancy. Unfortunately these emotions do not replace any emotional issues or tendencies that existed before conception. I still suffer from depression. However, now it is mixed with many other emotions.

The last few days have been mixed with morning sickness and depression. This is not the best combination to make a girl feel sexy and beautiful. Luckily my Sweetie works hard to make sure that I know that he thinks I am beautiful and sexy even when pregnant and hurling.

I know this is just a slump, a low, and it will pass. I just need to focus on all that I have as well as all who love me.

Sick of Sick

I am in my third day of feeling very sick. Before, my problem was the nausea. Now it is nausea as well as feeling like I will be violently ill at any moment. I am taking b6 to calm my stomach - hopefully it will help soon. People keep telling me, those that know anyway, that my sickness is a sign that baby will stick. I hope so. The doctor's appointment seems so far away. I simply want to hear the heartbeat or something, anything that shows me my Raspberry is healthy (that is the size of baby now). Last night I came home claiming that I am allergic to raspberries because of the way I am feeling. There is nothing worse than feeling like crap in a class where interaction is mandatory.

7 Weeks

I am halfway through this first trimester. Which sounds good. However, when you take into account the 7 weeks is if from LMP, 2 of those weeks were before conception. Add on the two weeks waiting to see if I was and you end up with three weeks of going through this stage. For me to hear 7 more weeks of this sounds horrible. OK not horrible, but not happy. I actually got sick yesterday. And while throwing up when you have the flu or a hangover can bring relief, that is not what I felt. I am not doing too much better today.

My Sweetie is having fun giving me a hard time about having twins. The fact that I started showing last week does not help :-) You would not know it to look at me. In fact I have lost weight in my face and such. However, my lower belly is poking out more than normal. This is not fat, this is baby - or at least body preparing for baby. It feels completely different and is very strange. Hopefully I will know for sure that it is only one next week at this time.

My Sweetie spent several minutes talking to my belly on Saturday asking him/her to stop making me sick :-) This is on top of the new routine of kissing me and then kissing belly. He has been so wonderful. I actually was able to pour my own OJ this morning - he has been doing everything for me. Who knew he would get so into this pregnancy and so soon. Don't get me wrong - he was in this from before the cells joined. He is actually the one who made the final decision of NOW is the time. And when something is meant to be, nothing can stop it.

Tonight is my late night - starting to hate Mondays. It is just such a long day. And, of course, I have homework that must be done before class. It is ok - I am hoping to take an on-line course next semester. That way if I get put on bed rest, I can still attend classes.

We have only bought a couple of toys, waiting on the doctor's visit before anything else. I know the danger zone that we are in and must be practical about the situation.

This is what the websites say my baby looks like now

Welcome Amelia

I received a call last night from my pregnant friend - the one who rubbed off on me :-)

She was due on Halloween. However, apparently someone wanted the candy. On Oct 17th at 11:22pm Amelia came into the world. This friend is Polish so I cannot even pronounce the middle name. She arrived at 6lbs 4oz and 20 inches. Mother and baby went home yesterday and are doing wonderfully, other than Mother sounding so exhausted.

I am waiting to tell a lot of people about the baby until after the first doctor's visit. However, there was no way I could keep it from her last night. She was so wonderful and got so excited for me and my Sweetie. I cannot wait to meet this little one.

The Chinese Calendar was correct with her, if it is with me - then I am carrying a boy.

Hormones are fun

Now I will have to deny it if you ask me, as any good pregnant woman will, but I believe that the hormones have set in. I cry at anything lately. This weekend my Sweetie and I went shopping and planning for the baby. We did not buy anything other than a couple of toys, but we did make notes on the cribs and strollers that we like. I was pretty good through this phase - focused on making my notes. However, when we made it to the mall and went into Hallmark, things changed. We were in a Christmas isle that showcased several stocking holders. This is when it hits me that we need to buy another stocking holder, not for this Christmas mind you. But that thought sent me teary eyed. This type of situation happened again last night as I was driving home and turned on Magic 95 - easy listening sounds good right now - and the love song show was on. Yep, teary eyed while driving is not good.
This has gone on for a couple of weeks now, much sooner than I thought, but it is here. It should be a very interesting Christmas.

In other news the nausea is still hanging on, the girls are too big for my bras, and the two weeks until our first OB visit is sooo far away. From what I am reading, I am a normal pregnant lady - with hormones, fears, concerns, and lack of concentration. I can't wait until I tell work so they can understand my brain lately.

My Sweetie has been so wonderful through all of this. He makes me food, rubs my feet, escorts me to the store, and since the day we found out started talking to the baby. He is going to be so wonderful as a father. If he is half as good as being a father as he is at being a husband, the child will be so very lucky.

Enough ramblings, I must get back to work. Wait, what do I do? Where am I? Who are you?

This is what my baby looks like according to the websites

Fall has taken over

I awake to a dark morning. This is a sign of the upcoming time change. The weather is perfect, although I am cold right now. The outside temp right now is only 73 :-) I love this. The sky is overcast with a threat of thunder storms. My Sweetie and I love thunder storms. Of course he will be away from the house tonight - game night with some new friends. So I will simply get into some comfy sweats and work on my Business Law Midterm.

On another note - and one I want to make sure that I post because soon enough I am sure this will not be the case. I feel so thin today. I feel great. My jeans are loose and I feel confident. This is good since what I have read (Dr's appointment is on Nov 1st) I should only gain like 2 pounds during my first trimester. I am eating whenever I am hungry - which is rare with my nausea. But even that is good today. And I know - way too much TMI - but my boobs don't hurt today. So today is a good day. I am still trying to hold out and not tell work until after the doctor's appointment. I want to make sure everything is ok. My Sweetie and I completed our first pregnancy walk last night, it was very good - not too strenuous.

It has not sunk it - so much going on right now - I think the doctor's visit will help.

And then there were three!

So I have written many times about my confidence rising and my transformation beginning. I had no idea how much this is true. My Sweetie and I went to the Doctor's on Oct 5th. The results? We are anticipating the arrival of our first child. I am due around June 12th. This is amazing. All grandparents know so I can post with confidence. While I know that we are not out of the woods as far as danger goes, I would rather have everyone know and able to support us in the event that the worst occurred.

So far I am doing good. I have nausea and exhaustion. However, I am able to eat very healthy foods in moderation. Sweets are not looking appealing, which is very strange. I had symptoms right away but figured it was my brain teasing me.

My Sweetie has been so wonderful. He is taking the best care of me and baby. He is even reading up on what the baby is experiencing right now, according to the books he is 2mm. He is letting me do very little at home and checks in on me to see how I am doing. I can see in his eyes that he is completely in love with me and this family. I am so happy to have this man's baby. I am so happy to have a family.

And to answer everyone's questions:

When are you due? June 12

Was this planned? Yes, we decided to start trying thinking that it would take awhile. However, we got pregnant the first time without protection. BE AWARE ANY TEENAGE GIRLS READING THIS.

Are you still going to school? Yes, graduation is still scheduled for May. I only have one class next semester so, unless my doctor says otherwise, I will walk with a big 8 month pregnant belly.

What about the CPA? The CPA is on hold for now. However, I am completely fine with this. Things happen at certain times for a reason. My company never reimbursed me for the cost, so this is not an issue.

Do you want to stay home? Yes, I want to stay home the first year. We are going to see what it will take to make it happen. I am very determined about this.

OK I have to get some more water - always thirsty - and have to pee - always have to pee :-)

Interesting

Ever thought you would explode?

Already October??

How can this be?

This weekend was wonderful. Saturday was rainy and cool. To me and my Sweetie, this is a perfect day. We just spent time together enjoying each other's company while window shopping and day dreaming about the future. We did get some cleaning and laundry accomplished which made the weekend feel productive. I hate to jinx anything, but our relationship is so wonderful right now. We are spending such quality time together while we talk and enjoy ourselves. I feel safe with this man like no one else. It is an incredible feeling, to have a relationship of 12 years to begin anew.

Tonight is school - I am pretty prepared for class -nothing that the two hours on campus before class begins can't complete. This week I have to write about 5 pages or so for business law. Hopefully this will not be too stressful.

Monday nights are the hardest - between out of synch sleep schedules, first day of the week, and a late class, it is very tiring. Only 2 months left of class, only two months until my case is due - ok that might have stirred up some stress :-)

New Day

Today I woke up thinking - today is the beginning of many great things to come. Nothing in particular caused this feeling. I am just having another great "new beginnings" day. I am feeling confident today, I am feeling in charge of my destiny. All in all it is a good day. When considering all the stress in my life, my depression has stayed away - at least more than in the past under the same circumstances. This marks the 14th day of my change - my transformation - and it is amazing. I bought a journal this week that sums it up - "Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly". This is me - I am becoming a butterfly.

P.S.

Also wanted to add that this weekend I even bought a sun dress that I never would have - but that my Sweetie liked a lot. While my old self would have felt insecure in a sleeveless sundress - wanting to wait until all the weight is gone - my new self wore it with pride to my Sweetie's work. The dress clings in the right areas and is very comfortable. I was so comfortable in this outfit that I walked around his office barefoot.

Change is on the horizon.

Let me introduce you to Me!

Today I am Me. I mean, I am always me. However, today I feel that I am who I really am – without masks or smoke and whistles. Not that today is the turning point – this past week I have felt more alive and more comfortable in my own skin. Not only do I think it is my confidence, but also all aspects of my life coming together.

Today I am comfortable. I am wearing jeans, black loafers, and a pink t-shirt with the Target logo that represents Breast Cancer Awareness and Research. Last night I dyed my hair – always go very dark this time of year – and I love it. I am going back to the super short haircut – not sure when, but it is coming. Today I am wearing my glasses due to eyes not wanting my contacts. When I look in the mirror, I smile thinking that I am looking at me. Today I have my computer with me – for school tonight. My bag is another symbol of me. I have two pins on my bag (both my sweetie and I are very into pins). One is a pink ribbon and the other is a pin that says “Walk On” for Team in Training.

As you can tell, I am very into the whole cancer research for a cure and charitable organizations scene. I see myself working closer with Team in Training and the Breast Cancer societies when I am out of school. The Avon Breast Cancer Walk is interesting me – 60 miles in 3 days for a great cause gets my blood pumping.

This is me. It is hard to look deep inside yourself and determine what really exists. We tend to blame actions and personality flaws on others, as a reaction rather than a trait. I know that I get stressed easily, I know that I am very strong, I know that I am very smart, and I know that my feelings are mine. No one else can take them from me. My passion defines me, my strength enables me, and my outlook on life gives me hope for tomorrow.

Strength

Saturday Dark Diva invited me to join a dating type-site that includes many questions and tests and determines compatibility. She wanted us to join in order to see how compatible we are as friends, just for fun. Well turns out so far, I have not answered all questions; we are about 73% compatible as friends. This is interesting. I filled out the profile and there is a section where you put three adjectives to describe yourself: I chose cute, intelligent, and strong.

Recently, over the last week, my husband has told me on several occasions that I am very strong. This got me thinking. Am I strong? I guess so. Moreover, I am proud of this trait. I might stress out at times, but I can deal with a lot of stress and handle many situations where others would crumble. I can focus on a goal and make sure that the needed items are complete, and more importantly push through even when they are not.

I think I am a very emotional person. I mean that I feel deeply. My emotions are strong and passionate. I understand that with love you will find pain at times. I also understand that without the pain the love is not appreciated or even re-ignited. Not to make light of any situation, but things happen for a reason, sometimes to simply force our eyes to open and to begin anew.

Weekend Update

This weekend was wonderful. Spent Friday night with friends and all day Saturday with my Sweetie. I weighed in at WW and I have lost 10 pounds. Whoo hoo. I am so happy. Sunday was filled with errands with my Sweetie and mother. After shopping, (grocery and for niece’s b-day) my Sweetie and I went to his work. This was my first time to see his office. I worked on accounting homework while he completed actual work. It was so much fun. The weekend ended with me coloring my hair while my Sweetie put new sheets on our bed – soooo comfy. Overall, a great weekend that I did not want to end.

It is the thought that counts!

Today my Sweetie wanted to have lunch with me, very spontaneous. Although we could not meet because he had an early afternoon deadline on a project. He wanted to chance it, just to see me. However, I said that I didn't want to be the cause. So we had lunch together over IM.

While writing this I got a call from Security saying there is a package that needs my signature. I go downstairs to find a beautiful ceramic basket filled with flowers. They are so beautiful.

With a simple note:

I love you more than anything
You are my world
Forever

This is huge - I have never received flowers for no reason, ie always a birthday or anniversary, and my Sweetie has a bad habit of forgetting to sign his name. This time he remembered. I love this man.

A Step Up

So once again this perhaps should be in my other blog, but it has meaning on the rest of my life as well. At my work if you park in the back you have to go down almost 2 flights of stairs to get into work. And as I know you can figure out - when parking here you have to climb these stairs to get back to your car. I have parked there almost the entire time working here. There is another parking area that is higher than the one I park in with an extra flight of stairs - building is on a hill. I told myself when I get into better shape I will park there. Well, today I did it. The recent weight loss and increase in my confidence gave me the power. I was the only car up there when I parked. It is so beautiful with trees and a trail. Now I know this means I must climb these stairs to get back to my car - and we will see the kind of shape I am in as I leave the parking lot. But the point is that I did it. I am trying to remind myself daily that I can do anything. I am an independent and strong woman and when I put my mind to something, I can do it. I have this track record - school and marathons prove this. I plan to use this determination to help in all areas of my life. I refuse to wait any longer. No more waiting until I lose weight or finish school. Life is now and I must embrace this or I will lose everything.

Wonderful Invention

There is an attachment for the ipod that allows you to listen to your ipod through your radio, itrip. You set your itrip to an unused station. We found out that if your car is close to someone using itrip, and you know the station that they use - you can hear their music. Very interesting.

This morning my Sweetie and I were on our way to work in different cars. He always listens to music and I normally listen to silence so if he is close I will turn on the radio to see if he is listening to anything worthwhile.

Today's first selection was not my kind of ipod listening. However, the second was. Recently my Sweetie and I have chosen a new song for us and this was playing. Now keep in mind that the cars have to be fairly close in order to share. He knew I was listening and I knew he wanted me to listen - so throughout the song I was holding back to let him catch up and he was catching up so I could keep the frequency. It was much like making love - give and take.

What a wonderful way to start the day!

Confidence

I am working on my confidence - going to start exercising again as well as incorporating yoga into my routine. I am also making sure that I work on my self-esteem. Actually, strangely enough it has been good lately; feeling sexy, beautiful, and strong. The past days have given me a new feeling of hope in my ability to control my destiny. I like control. Although my desk and house does not show it, I like order. I like to know the outcome of things and what it will take to get me there.

Because of this, I am postponing my first two sections of the CPA until the beginning of the year. This semester is harder than expected and I think I will benefit from some self-evaluation. I will still be studying every weekend, but only 8 hours compared to 16. This was a hard decision. However, I think it is for the best. I have a big project in Accounting Ethics that has potential for publication. That would be nice. Moreover, what is my hurry - passing should be my focus not becoming a hermit to reach the goal.

I will make sure to get my studies complete as planned - and yes a daily account of what needs to be accomplished already exists - on excel. Nevertheless, I need to make sure that I take as much effort for myself. I need to make sure that I put myself first from here on out. I need to make sure that I know what I want and how to reach these goals. Independence and a clear head - that is my goal.

At this point in my life, there are many decisions to make. I have to have confidence in my ability to make them correctly. I have to trust in my instincts. They have yet to be wrong. Unfortunately, I seem to have an unbelievable sense of ESP at times. I appreciate it and hate it. Can’t we all live in ignorant bliss? Is there even such a thing? There just seems to be so many issues right now.

Cynicism is an interesting thing. You lose as many people as I have, and have hurt as many times as I have – and you grow cynical. You begin to see the crazy hysteria with everyday life.

Life is Strange

So I will post this in my other blog - or at least intend to, but it is such good news that I wanted to share. Something finally clicked. I am losing weight. Have no idea how much due to missing the last two weeks at weight watchers and my scale is broken. However, I can see the difference. My Sweetie says he can see it too. Won't go into the details, but the evidence is there. All of the sudden I am following core and it is not a chore. And yesterday I got into a size smaller jeans. Today I am wearing a size smaller skirt. For the first time in over 2 years I feel like I can lose this weight, that I can get healthy. Things are different this time.

My Motto

Cause I've relied on my illusion to keep me warm at night

Silver Lining

I am a silver-lining kind of person. I know if you know me you might doubt this statement at times due to my stress-out moments. Let me rephrase - I prepare for the worst while hoping for the best and try to see the good or "meant to be" in everything. I am a strong believer in fate. I believe things happen and we are where we are for a reason. Even when things are painful or uncertain - they are for a purpose. For example, fate sent me to SKIDS to experience that awful place. If not for there, I would not be here. I love my job and my company. Most importantly, I love my boss. I realized why I like him so much - he reminds me of my best friend's husband. Do not get me wrong, just because I identify him as her husband, does not mean we are not friends. I think of him as a close friend that I trust deeply. Well, back to the point....

Sometimes awful things happen to open our eyes - to give appreciation. When an event like this happens it is like a veil lifts to reveal the truth. This truth, though sometimes hard to swallow, makes one reevaluate the current path. It pierces the tent of illusions that beneath we live. If we are lucky, this unveiling will reveal a beautiful starry sky that we would have never known existed otherwise.

Past Three Days

The last three days were emotional with

Anger
Sadness
Confusion
Depression
Heartache
Passion
Tears
Distractions
Reevaluations
Closure
Bubble Bath
Winding Roads
Foot Massage
Intimate Discussions

It's Amazing

It is amazing how one's world can change in a heartbeat. People die and marraiges end at one moment in time. From that point on nothing will ever be the same. When you are in that moment your heart beats fast and you feel like you are going to puke. Your mind races to the strangest things, insurance and bank accounts. Suddenly your plans for the next ten years or even year change suddenly. Numbness sets in and doing anything or seeing anyone seems impossible. You doubt your ability to continue or function. The thought of waking up alone hurts. The thought of solitude is scary. Holidays are coming and you can't comphrehend the presence of others. However you can't help but wonder, in a cynical way, if things are turning out for the best.

Feeling Better

I must say that I am feeling better today. It has taken too long. Between sinus infection and food poisoning - it wasn't fair. But today I feel great. Ok a little tired - but other than that I am good. I worked late last night, but did not mind. I had a good day yesterday. I finally had the day where I feel that I belong here. My boss is great and stood up for me. That is helping to ease the pain and anxiety that SKIDS left behind. I also met the CAO of our parent company. I was not even nervous. And today I met with the Controller and was comfortable enough to talk about my job and my duties without sounding like an idiot. My boss even gave me credit for some of my ideas in this meeting. All in all a good day - and it isn't even 2.

The person I replaced returned to the mothership. At first I did not know how I felt about it. However, I am ok. She is working in a different department with different duties. I know that I can do this job better - and I will just have to prove it to everyone else. I am starting to wonder if I want to stay here after graduation or if I actually want to pursue the audit industry. We shall see - I have some time to think about it.

Update on me

Well I am doing a bit better. I was able to eat a normal dinner last night. However, I don't feel great today. My back is killing me and it hurts worse as I breath deeply. This is not fair. The good thing is that I am busy at work today - so hopefully the day will pass quickly.

I contemplated switching to the slower testing option. However, after much contemplation, I decided against it. Mostly because I am feeling withdrawn from family and friends as it is. I don't want to stretch that out any longer than needed.

So I just have to buckle down and take my medicine - referring to studying. Six months is not a long time. That is all I have until the tests are complete. Lord knows I don't want to have to study a second time.

Thank you all for understanding during this time. I promise to make it up to everyone once everything settles. This is another reason why I like my blog. I can let everyone know what is going on in my head with one post.

TMI

Read at your own risk.

Yesterday morning I woke up with a cautious stomach. Not really feeling sick - but could tell I needed to stick to soup. I thought I was doing better at 2:30 and opted for some chocolate cake for my boss' 40th b-day. By 3:30 I was feeling worse and even threw up at work. I wrote to my professor and let her know I could not make it to class. I headed home and sure enough threw up on the way home - thank heavens for plastic sandwich bags. This continued through the evening with violent episodes. Thanks goodness my Sweetie takes such good care of me. I was aching all over when I needed to go to bed so I took my good cough medicine - with codeine - to sleep deeper. The only problem is that I am groggy until 12 hours from the time I took the medicine. This combined with a bad headache and feeling less than perfect led to me sleeping an hour late. I woke up still feeling bad - but mostly groggy. Sure enough threw up again - this time was bad because nothing was left in my belly. I gathered some crackers and a mountain dew and headed to work. So far so good - however I am still exhausted and stomach hurts.

Now that I made everyone's day - I think it is food poisoning. And I hate to say it - I think it came from the shower. The one good thing is that I have lost weight. Can't say this is how I would like to lose the weight - but hey trying to find the silver lining. I have only been at work for an hour so I can't leave yet - prob will go home at noon - if I can make it. I would take my sinus infection over this any day of the week.

The Weekend

Well, this weekend was there. Friday night after I finished my bottle of wine - ok small bottle that holds one glass - I went out with my mom to get Dark Diva something special. I selected a purple suede journal to help her with her thoughts.

Saturday was not good - I was very low and wanted to stay in bed and cry. Luckily my Sweetie was there to help me and get me out of the house. He was the best all weekend. He always tries to make it all better. We went to the Apple store - what else will help end depression :-) The evening ended with best friend, moto diva, Dark Diva, and myself at Kerby Lane for dinner. We needed a place to sit and talk that was not too loud and where they would not shove us out the door. This place always cracks me up. My Sweetie worked as a bus boy when I met him- yep a job and a car. We were there from 7-11 just talking. Dark Diva is doing ok. She has taken the control route and taking care of things to keep her mind busy. It was a good visit.

Sunday was fun. My pregnant friend had a shower. She got a lot of cute items and more socks than she will know what to do with. She is due on Halloween. This is interesting because that was my due date - of course my birthday is the 12th - 2 weeks late. The other interesting thing is that she lives in a house almost identical to my parents house when I was born. Who knows maybe she will have a Missy. I test for the first section of the CPA the Friday before Halloween. So when she started saying how long she has until she has a baby, I started stressing because that is how long I have until I test :-)

After the shower and weekly grocery store visit - my Sweetie took very good care of me and making sure to keep my mood elevated.

All in all it wasn't a bad weekend.

My Boy

I have several cats (the exact number right now is to be determined). However, only one is my boy. This boy is the best kitty ever. He snuggles and takes care of me. I call him my stuffed animal who came to life. I know that after he goes to the rainbow bridge (many many many years from now) he will be the one that I long to replace. I walked in from work this evening to find him sleeping on the couch that you can see from the doorway. He stretched and moved him head under a throw pillow. All my emotions from the day came to a head as I walked towards this beautiful orange creature. I walked directly to him, kneeled by the couch and proceeded to cry into my kitty. Not all cats will let you do this, or even care if you cry. He knew I was upset and let me hold him while I sobbed. He didn't even mind his fur wet with tears. He is 5 years old and has been a wonderful creature every day. He is my furry child. He understands me the best.

Hard Day

I am having a very hard day, and it is only morning. I mentioned before that September is always hard on me. I expected this one to be worse and I am correct. Heard from best friend last night. We (best friend, moto diva, and I) and getting together with Dark Diva this weekend. I have been trying to think of something to do for Dark Diva that would be special from those who know. This has brought back so many feelings. I am sitting here at work tearing up. I miss my father so badly today that my stomach, heart, and throat ache. I don't want to be here right now. Don't want to be around anyone. What I would really like is to take a very long walk - wherever it leads me while listening to emotional music and letting the built up tears flow. I think I will try to write some poetry today, always has helped in the past.

I think the part that really gets to me is how much my father has missed. In the last seven years I have gotten married, bought a house, finished school, continued on for my MBA, qualified for the CPA, walked two half marathons for charity, and got a great job.

I will go this weekend to visit Dark Diva. I will try to hold back some of my emotions. I will resist the urge to run from this event. I don't think I will make weight watchers tomorrow. Instead I will try to go for the walk that I need. I need to work through this. Not "get over" but get into a better place. Yes, even after 7 years it hurts. But I think all of the circumstances this year makes the pain worse.

I tend to keep my emotions inside - don't want to bother others. I need to remember that those around me love me and want to help.

I need to go shopping.

Music Time

Silent All These Years
~Tori Amos - Little Earthquakes

Excuse me but can I be you for a while
My dog won't bite if you sit real still
I got the anti-Christ in the kitchen yellin' at me again
Yeah I can hear that
Been saved again by the garbage truck
I got something to say you know
But nothing comes
Yes I know what you think of me
You never shut-up
Yeah I can hear that

But what if I'm a mermaid
in these jeans of his
with her name still on it
Hey but I don't care
cause sometimes
I said sometimes
I hear my voice
And it's been here
Silent All These Years

So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thougts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts
Boy you best praya that I bleed real soon
How's that thought for you
My scream got lost in a paper cup
You think there's a heaven
Where some screams have gone
I got 25 bucks and a cracker
Do you think it's enough
To get us there

Cause what if I'm a mermaid
In these jeans of his
With our name still on it
Hey but I don't care
Cause sometimes
I said sometimes
I hear my voice
And it's been here
Silent All These...

Years go by
Will I still be waiting
For somebody else to understand
Years go by
If I'm stripped of my beauty
And the orange clouds
Raining in head
Years go by
Will I choke on my tears
Till finally there is nothing left
One more casualty
You know we're too easy Easy Easy

Well I love the way we communicate
Your eyes focus on my funny lip shape
Let's hear what you think of me now
But baby don't look up
The sky is falling
Your mother shows up in a nasty dress
It's your turn now to stand where I stand
Everybody lookin' at you here
Take hold of my hand
Yeah I can hear them

But what if I'm a mermaid
in these jeans of your
with her name still on it
Hey but I don't care
cause sometimes
I said sometimes
I hear my voice

And it's been here
Silent All These Years
I've been here
Silent All These Years

Good Morning

In spite of feeling awful last night and still groggy from my cough medicine this morning - the morning is beautiful. At around 60 degrees it is perfect for me. This made me very happy. However, it also made me want to stay outside and not come into the building. My office is in the middle of beautiful trees with a nice neighborhood as a backyard. So the quiet cool morning is enhanced. I have to get rid of this infection so I feel up to walking again.

From now through February my schedule is busy. This does not mean that I do not have time to hang out or that I am going to become a hermit. This week is my 6th week of the BEC CPA review and the 1st week of the REG review. From here on out I will have to study for two sections at a time. This is doable if I stick to my schedule. I really enjoyed my study time on Monday. I hope that this continues. I think I figured what will work for me. And in the end I am the one who has to take the tests.

This is definitely going to be a fun and exciting semester.

Dark Diva's Loss

This weekend was not all happy. However, I wanted to write about this in a different post. My friend, the Dark Diva, lost her mother on Saturday night. While driving she had a heart attack and did not survive. September is a hard month. Dark Diva lost her father in September 1999. I lost my father in September 1997. Hearing the news from my best friend really hit me. I never met her mother - but I have been crying for her pain, for her loss, and all losses. Dark Diva asked for some quiet time - which I can understand. I should see her sometime this week and will be able to see for myself how she is holding up. My Mother really likes all of my Diva friends so I called her to let her know. We are going to send a gift to show our support. However, not the normal "sorry for your loss" tokens. She will receive enough of those. I e-mailed Dark Diva and offered babysitting or anything else that might help. One thing that bonded Moto Diva, Dark Diva and myself during our camping trip was the loss of our fathers. She knows we understand loss and hopefully she will let us help.

September is always hard for me. I can always tell a difference in my emotions and my state of mind. This one is going to be even harder - good thing I have CPA to distract me.

I cannot say it enough - don't wait until tomorrow to tell someone how you feel.

Love my ipod

OK so it took a couple of weeks but I finally imported a lot of music over the weekend into itunes and, of course, into my ipod. I must say I finally really understand how it is different than a discman - I was in a bubble bath listening to shuffle that consisted of Sarah Brightman, Sarah McLachlan, and Blue Man Group. I am at work now listening as I work. I don't listen to music because I worry about bothering others around me - work in a cube. I can get used to this :-)

Weekend Update

My weekend was good. Friday we went and saw Hero - it is a beautiful movie.

Saturday was a lazy day ending with a date night with my Sweetie. We went to dinner and came home to capture a kitten and its mother - we have fed the mother for a year now and want to make sure that she doesn't have any more babies. That was definitely exciting and not really expected. They are living in our guest bathroom until we can get them to the vet.

Sunday was the normal grocery store and such as well as visiting good friends.

Unfortunately when I woke up on Monday I was not feeling well - my luck with a holiday. My Sweetie planned to play his game all day to let me study. In spite of feeling sick I am proud to report 3 hours of quality study time.

I am afraid that I will be back at the doctor's office again this week. If I am not feeling better soon I am sure he is going to run some tests. What if he finds out that I have evolved and am better than human?

Still Infected

On Monday I started to feel bad again, much like with my sinus infection at the end of July. I thought it might be a cold because the Dark Diva told me she had one from Friday (when we babysat) through Monday. So I have been taking my vitamin C and other holistic items to reduce the length of a cold. Well yesterday it was worse, still able to go to work - but feeling like crap. So I went to the doctor and found out that I am still infected. In spite of feeling better for two weeks, the infection remains. He gave me some more antibiotics, this time 14 days worth, and allergy medicine. He said I should feel better before Saturday - which is good because I have a date with my Sweetie. I am in a great mood today. It is close, which I love because I am so busy, and Friday. YEAH!! And a three day weekend.

I Love Fall

I do. It is my favorite time of year. Where the temperatures are ok for shorts but you might want a light sweater, where the wind is cool with a hint of cold, the leaves falling, pumpkin candles, chili (mom makes it for me every year), the shorter days (love driving home in the dark), my b-day, my best friend's b-day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and mornings that call for me to go outside and walk. I think that is why I am in the best mood today. While I have not gone outside since I got to work - the weather bug shows the top temp at 80 and currently 79. This is fall, baby. I work by a large window and I see a partially grey sky and I smile. I want to get home and walk - might not be able to tonight - but I will be out there tomorrow enjoying this time of year. I will not let everything that is going on stop me from enjoying this season.

Psyched

I am in a great mood today. Don't know why, but I won't complain. I am really excited about the CPA exam and am even looking forward to my marathon study sessions on the weekend. I am happy with my classes so far and know the semester is going to be stressful - but I am focusing on passing two CPA exams and finishing two classes. It is going to be good. This is a marathon just like I have successfully completed before, the only difference is that this one involves my brain. After all, the test itself is only 2.5 hours. I have had college tests last longer than that. I also discovered that my first portion will not have any writing on it, this means that I should get my score quickly - in theory at least. The TSBPA has the expected release of grades as January for my tests in October and November and April for my tests in January and February. We shall see. All I know is that in 6 months I will have this exam complete. I can do this!

First night over

Class went well last night. It was Accounting Ethics from 7-10. Of course the instructor held us the whole time. She is a tough cookie, but one of my all time favorites - in spite of everything. This class format is like the course I took last fall - Cost Management. The class is case based. This means that we read real life cases and analyze. I was wondering how she would approach an Ethics course. Luckily she decided on the case approach. We read AICPA code on ethical issues as well as selected cases - yes Enron and Martha Stewart are a couple of recent cases on our agenda - and then go to class to discuss. Last night was the first class. However, she got us going and the night held a few heated debates. I loved it. Then we kind of acted out the case we read. We had assigned roles and played out the court case, nothing scripted. I was able to be an attorney and able to question the management that created the fraud. I was awesome. I had absolutely no problem with this role or the fact that I was in front of the class. mmmmmm perhaps law school :-) Ok maybe not law school - will leave that for others. However, I feel more confident in my abilities to become an auditor.

I think I am going to really like this semester. Not only does everything I am doing tie together - school wise as well as CPA, but I am genuinely interested in the classes and exams. I stayed after last night and spoke with the professor about my upcoming CPA exam. She was so excited. I wanted to make sure she knew because the last time she saw me I was working for EVIL and not myself. She could not believe everything that is in the section I am taking. I also announced to the entire class when I sit for the BEC section. Now I have to pass.

Semester Plan

I just wanted to give everyone a brief plan for the semester.

August
2 - CPA review for BEC portion begins
30 - Accounting Ethics Begins - Monday nights through 11/29

September
2 - Business Law Begins - Online through 12/2
7 - CPA review for REG portion begins

October
14 - Midterm for Business Law
18 - Midterm in Ethics
29 - CPA BEC TEST - 8:30-12

November
1 - CPA review for FAR portion begins
12 - MY B-DAY
24 - Hope to test for REG section
29 - CPA review for AUD portion begins
29 - Final Ethics

December
2 - Final Business Law

Then I have a wonderful break from school until Jan 18th. It really is not that bad of a schedule - just wanted to let everyone know. For the most part I will be studying 10 hours on Saturdays and 7 on Sundays. I can do this - I will do this.

Another Monday

My vacation is over and I am back at work. While I did not complete the long list of self inflected "honey-dos", I did rest and pampered myself a little. It was good. Tonight starts a new semester with class from 7-10. That makes for a long Monday. This class, Accounting Ethics, is just like Cost Management that I took last fall. Same instructor, same day, same format, same classroom. Although I learned a lot in this class, and in hindsight it was one of my favorites, I did not enjoy the process. I actually swore off Monday classes. But here I am again. One thing I am bad about is procrastination. However, I am even worse with this with assignments for the first class. I mean, come on - give us a small break. So during lunch today I will read my case and hope to get something that I can turn in tonight.

The CPA exam is really hitting me. Due to a rude awakening on the depth of the subject matter for economics I had to reevaluate my studying. Last night I set up which day will result in which studying. I am going to try and get my school items taken care of during the week allowing for the weekends for CPA review. Saturdays will be designated for the upcoming test and Sundays the next test, I have overlapping review sessions for all sections. This should work well. I know the worst part will be through November. I can handle that.

But I might have to take a nap when I get to campus :-)

We Survived

Last night my Sweetie and I babysat for my friend the Dark Diva. She has two girls, One 2.5 years and one 10 months. We were awesome. Not only did the girls survive the night with even going to bed fairly close to their normal time, the parents came home to dishes clean and all toys picked up. We really enjoyed ourselves. The best thing is that I did not have to say "OK you do this while I do that", we were a team all the way. While watching two girls for a few hours on one night does not compare to parenthood. Any and all doubts I ever had in my Sweetie's ability to be a good father are completely gone. We watch my niece on a regular basis and have since she was a little younger than the older one last night, it is different with two. It is also different with nonrelated children. But they were very good. The evening was nice and relaxing. Did not get to bed until 3:30 so I missed my weight watcher meeting this morning. But that is ok. It was worth it for my friend to have a date night. Another amazing part of the night was that we are the first outside of the grandparents to watch these wonderful girls. I am honored. Whenever the husband would start to give an instruction, which I did not mind, the Dark Diva would say "Oh Missy knows". Guess I have this mommy like energy. Now I have to complete the CPA and my MBA before I can start day dreaming too much.

9 Weeks

After receiving the acceptance letter from the TSBPA you must submit an eligibility application. Once this is approved you then register your payment coupon with paying for the exam. After this is verified the next step is to schedule a testing location and time. These steps must be followed for each section of the CPA.

It is official. I completed the last step and am testing on October 29th from 8:30-12. I got the time that I wanted. Now I have 9 weeks to prepare. While this is not long, I am prepared to do what I need to in order to pass. During this time I have two classes to keep up with as well as the beginning of my second review. Things are going to be very busy between now and Thanksgiving. But worth it.

I discovered last night that the best approach, for me, is not reading a chapter and doing the problems. I am behind on my review because of this approach. If I have to read, it is too passive for me and I will fall asleep. However, if I start with working the problems and read the sections that I missed - I am more likely to learn from my actions. This is how I will work the sections. I also have the Wiley CPA review books to aid in my studying. My goal is to pass - I can reach my goal.

Diva Core

I am on vacation this week. It has been wonderful. Sleeping in and having lunch with some of my favorite people. One thing that this time off has helped me to appreciate is the people in my life.

This past weekend I went camping with two of my friends. I have never had tons of good friends. And while the ones I have had have always meant the world to me, I have had my share of friends that were untrue, unfaithful, or mentally abusive. It was from the ending of one of these awful relationships that I realized that one of my newer friends were different from the others. I was drawn to her and somehow knew she could change my life. That she did. She told me repeatedly how important I am and how I can do anything. She is a true friend. She introduced me to three other women, two that I went camping with. All together there are five of us - the divas. Each of us is very different. One thing we have in common is that we have a center. The friend who brought me to these beautiful and strong women, brought us all together. She is our common ground. While she would never claim this victory - it is hers for the taking.

The camping trip was wonderful. It gave me a chance to interact with these women on my own, and I think I did well. This trip removed all doubt regarding them only hanging with me because of our core.

An interesting thing with me lately is the rise in my self esteem. I have not started my exercising or watching my food intact - but I am feeling more confident. I think this has to do with my friends, my work, and how close I am to graduating with my MBA. But the biggest thing, in my opinion, is that in 10 weeks I am testing for my first portion of the CPA. This is not a set path - this is something I am doing on my own, outside of work or school. And I will succeed. It helps that my family and friends are so supportive.

Hilltopper Pride

I am so proud. My school made the Best Colleges 2005 list.

GOOOOOO HILLTOPPERS!!!!!

TGIF!!!

It is Friday. Not only that - as soon as I leave today, my vacation begins. Although I am not going anywhere - this is some much needed time off. I plan to get caught up on my CPA studies as well as clean my house. Not that I am anal about the house. It is purely to reduce stress. When I am in school I do not keep up with the house due to so much on my plate - this leads to clutter - clutter leads to stress. Stress leads to unhappiness for all around me. And as predicted my professors for the fall send the assignments for the first class - each has around 4 chapters to read. My week will consist of CPA review, exercise, cleaning house, and pampering myself. It will be wonderful.

I am headed out for an overnight camping trip tomorrow. It should be a lot of fun. It is with two friends introduced to me by my best friend. The interesting thing is that my best friend is not going. So it will be the first time alone with these two wonderful and strong women. Let's hope I do not bore them to tears. I have to think of something yummy to bring for dinner - something that is suitable for camping.

World on Fire

These are lyrics from a Sarah Mclachlan song from her "Afterglow" album. It is stuck in my head today and I think very appropriate to share.

World on Fire

The worlds on fire its more then I can handle
Ill tap into the water try and bring my share
Try to bring more, more then I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

Hearts are worn
In these dark ages
You're not alone,
In these stories' pages
The light has fallen
Amongst the living and the dying
And I'll try to hold it in
Yeah I'll try to hold it in

The worlds on fire its more then I can handle
Ill tap into the water try and bring my share
Try to bring more, more then I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

I watch the heavens
But I find no calling
Something I can do to change what's coming
Stay close to me
While the sky is falling
I don't wanna be left alone,
Don't want to be alone...

The worlds on fire its more then I can handle
Ill tap into the water try and bring my share
Try to bring more, more then I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

Hearts break ... hearts mend ... love still hurts
visions clash ... planes crash
Still there's talk of saving souls
Still the cold is closing in on us

We part the veil on our killer sun
Stray from the straight line
On this short run ...
The more we take the less we become
The fortune of one man means less for some

The worlds on fire its more then I can handle
Ill tap into the water try and bring my share
Try to bring more, more then I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

It is done

Last night we did it, we bought me a 15" powerbook. My sweetie met me at the mall and we made the purchase. I am still a little weary regarding the whole event - only because I feel guilty. However, we did get me a nice computer as well as an ipod and color printer. Due to rebates the 20G ipod came to 70 and the printer to 0. It is nice. While I do not have internet access yet or microsoft office, I was able to set up some preferences last night. In order to calibrate the battery I had to charge it fully last night and now I have to use it with only the battery until it goes to sleep. Because of this I have it next to me now - sitting and taunting me. Good thing my boss is out of town and it is a very slow week for me. Have to admit - I can't wait to do the CPA review using this machine.

Can all be forgiven?

So grades are finally posted. While I knew on Friday that the I earned a B in the hardest course of the MBA, I still awaited my Marketing grade. I pretty much knew my grade as of Sunday night because the instructor posted our assignment grades - but not the final. When you are in graduate school grades are not always clear cut. So I waited. This morning it is official. In spite of the worst group EVER - I made an A in the class. This is so awesome. This means I am back on track as far as school goes. It also proves that my bad semester while working for the evil bunch was in fact due to the emotional stress they caused and not my abilities.

So I am feeling good about myself.

However, I do not feel very good today physically. I am still not completely over my sinus infection - or whatever it was. So I will take it easy this week. I can't be sick again - too much planned for next week.

Relax a Mouse

This weekend was wonderful. Friday I celebrated the end of the semester with some family and friends watching The Village at AlamoDraftHouse. I love that place. The movie was very good. In fact it was one of those that you like more after you leave the theater and keep talking about it.

Saturday was nice and relaxing. I got up in time for my Weight Watcher meeting. They were nice and let me reset my starting weight. Since being sick I have not followed anything. Then I picked up my Sweetie and started our day with lunch. Our first stop was school for Fall Semester books. My Sweetie is getting so much better. He did not even give a verbal response when my books, for two classes, totaled almost $300. We continued on to my work to drop off a couple of plants - since I have a window I should use it :-) My Sweetie got to see my cubicle and was impressed. Of course my work is right by the mall where a certain apple store lives. We looked and looked at the iBook and powerbooks. My Sweetie is convinced that I need a laptop for my CPA review and my last two semesters. Luckily they did not have the one I wanted. That is good since it forced more thinking time on the subject. However, I have to admit, it would be nice to be able to take my review with me where ever I go. hmmmm we shall see.

After stopping at Target and buying some LEGOs we headed home. I was not feeling great so I set myself up on the couch, took my good cough medicine, and proceeded to play with LEGOS while watching the Olympics. Now that is what I call a Saturday.

I have to admit I did not do any CPA review. Mostly I wanted a brain break.

Officially Official

Now it is official. I received my approval for the eligibility application for the BEC section of the CPA exam. This approval is good until Nov 16, 2004. The next step is to contact Prometric to pick a date, and of course pay the testing fee. This is crazy, I am actually doing it.

Last night was the last official night of the semester. YEAH!!! It is over. I think I will go today during lunch to get my books for next semester. Class starts on the 30th. I am so looking forward to my break. I plan to stay on course with the CPA review and clean my house. I know it sounds like a blast, doesn't it? You know you have too much going on when cleaning the house is something you have to plan for and get excited about.

During my break I am also working on a good plan for getting healthy for graduation. I have 39 weeks. I can accomplish a lot during this time. The important thing is to set realistic goals and have a plan that is flexible with school and CPA.

Tulsa Anyone?

First of all let me start by saying - No official offer has been made, we are not considering it, we do not wish to move right now.

So I go home yesterday to find an e-mail from the PWC partner that I met with in July. He recently moved to the Tulsa office and he e-mailed me asking if I would consider moving to Tulsa to work in his office. WOW. This is huge. Now I am not exactly packing my bags, but I am so honored. I told him to tell me his thoughts and that I would need incentive to move. I am not about to tell a partner "Hell No". I shall play the game. I posted awhile back about being an adult. Well I am officially an adult. I admit it. Not only that, I am an adult with a career. I am not simply a college student who works full time. I had a partner of a big 4 ask me to change states for an entry level position (because I have never audited before). This is huge. I am sure one of the reasons is that I impressed him, obviously, but also the Austin office may not be hiring right now.

My Sweetie has this theory
"you know, I was thinking about why Martin wants you in -his- office (aside from the usual "no space in Austin") - your interview impressed him because you made him discuss something he was passionate about. He is dedicated to that subject and by initiating a discussion about it, he knows you are of the same mind set."

I think he might be right. I will keep everyone updated on the dance.

Is this a waltz or a tango?

Karma Coma

Actually this is the title of a kewl song. However, my karma is high today. On Friday I went to Albertson's and purchased my favorite sushi and chopsticks. When I got home I discovered that the chop sticks did not scan. This normally would be a "their loss" thought (esp after spending this whole semester on the company). However, this was at a self checkout - there was a whole issue with "item not scanned" and the head guy cleared the issue from the main station - I thought it scanned the chopsticks as well. So today I went back to Albertson's - more sushi - and purchased a pair of chopsticks. I then went to the main self check out guy and explained that I ended up not paying for the pair I took on Friday and that I scanned these to make sure that they received payment. When I handed the new chopsticks to him I think that is when it sunk in what I was doing. He was very surprised and thanked me for my honesty.

3.19 added to my karma :-)

Walking on Air

So today is wonderful, other than allergies. My AWFUL group is over. My semester is over - other than a class tomorrow with nothing required from me. I am happy. Class went over by an hour last night. But it was worth it. I don't have to see the worst of the group again, they graduate on Saturday.

Now I have 19 days without school work - or at least I hope. I am sure I will have homework due on the first day of class - as normal. But it is my second to last semester so it is all good. I am so happy that I am not graduating until May. I am really going to miss my school. I already can't wait to buy my books for the next semester - my favorite part of the semester - not the actual price, but getting the new supplies. I was like this as a child too. Loved getting school supplies and then I would bring all my books home and look through them anticipating the coming year. I am like this with every semester. Honestly, it is going to be hard in January when I purchase that last book. While I will love not having to stay up late or spend my whole weekends writing papers, I will miss being a student. I am sure you all think I am crazy. There is an office depot by my work so I think I will go all out for my supplies for this next semester. Oh and I should stock up for my CPA review as well.....

Tonight is the Night

Tonight my marketing class ends. YEAH. No more bad group.

I should be happier but I am in a funk today. Don't really know the reason, but everything is annoying me today. I did not sleep well last night and in turn am not feeling well today. It is not fair. It is going to be a late night tonight.

Perhaps it is just my mood - but do you ever get the feeling that you can't do anything right for anyone (work or family)? That is just the way I feel today.

Light at the end of the Tunnel

OK guys I can see the light. It is there - tomorrow at 10pm I will be dancing. Not only will this be the end of my semester, but also the worst group in the entire world. My marketing group is even worse than my group in Cost Management where my partner quit the class halfway through. Tomorrow is the last class and that makes me so happy. I won't rant and rave to you about them - but they suck completely. There is only one that I like.

This weekend I took the diagnostic exam for the BEC section of the CPA. I scored a 41%. Not bad when considering that if I did not know the subject matter I simply guessed and I took it during a LAN party. Honestly, I wanted to see my strengths and a lucky guess will not help me any. To pass the CPA you must score a 75%, so I am more than halfway there. I am happy with my initial score, if I scored a 75 or higher I would have potentially wasted money on the program, still waiting on work to agree to pay for the course.

Due to school and feeling a bit ill again, I did not get everything that I wanted for my CPA study this weekend. However, with 19 days without school to worry about, I will catch up without any problems. I received confirmation that I can take the week of Aug 23rd off from work. Of course this is not the time for me to think about the fact that the instructors at my school like to assign homework for the first class.

I am hoping to start my walking program again today - nice and slow. I still have 40 weeks until graduation ;-)

Speaking in Public

I have a presentation tonight. It is with my Accounting group for the really hard course. We are the first to present and I am the first to talk in the group. Wish me luck. This is the biggest group project that I have ever done - weighing in at 48 pages. I think I am ready - just need to leave early to practice some more. It is a power point presentation so I have to do the whole talking and clicking thing.

I have not focused on exercise or food this week - trying to get over my sinus infection first. However, I can tell the difference today and I am aching to go walking. This weekend marks 40 weeks until I walk the stage, and for all intents and purposes, the last time. During this forty weeks I am taking three MBA courses, Passing four sections of the CPA - with a total of 400 study hours min, and trying to stay sane and healthy. To do this I am also going to try and lose weight and get back into shape. We shall see how this works.

After tonight and through Monday night I have to focus on my Marketing class and get it finished. Then at about 10:00 on Tuesday night I am going to be dancing. I need a break so badly. Isn't it nice that the school gives me a whole two weeks off? Please note my sarcastic tone. I can't complain in between the fall and the spring I get like 6 weeks off. I can handle that. The only problem is that instructors at my school like to assign homework before the class begins. Then the two weeks really becomes a week if I am lucky. All in a effort to earn three little initials - MBA.

OK back to work.

My Sweetie's B-day

Today my Sweetie turns 29. To celebrate I got him the new 40g ipod - new look and change in buttons and such. Thank goodness for student discounts. I could not wait to give it to him - bad habit of mine - so I woke him up last night when I got in from school and gave it to him. The apple store bags are cool enough that wrapping was not needed. Every year on his b-day for as long as we have lived together (7 years now) I awake my sweetie with a special breakfast. For some reason the tradition became turnovers. This year it was apple turnovers. Such a lucky guy :-)

Tonight we are celebrating just the two of us with family on Friday and friends on Saturday. I have a big presentation tomorrow for my Accounting course so tonight he will be lucky enough to hear my portion 7 times. Was told in a communications class that to be prepared for a presentation a person must practice 7 times.

Because of school I have not really started the CPA studying. The assignment for this week is two chapters. I plan to do this on Saturday and Sunday. However, I am reading the practical advice section and learning a lot on how the test is scored. For example, I did not know that missing a multiple choice type question does not reduce your score. Getting the correct answer simply raises it. For this reason they say to answer all questions, even if you have to guess.

Did I mention that I cannot wait until the semester ends?

CPA Update

While I was sick I registered for the Bisk CPA review. That was an interesting conversation with my voice almost gone completely. The review started yesterday. It is on-line with instructor led assignments over the course of 7 weeks. I think this is going to be very good for me.

Interesting thing is that they do refer to the prep time for the CPA as studying. Instead they call it "training". In fact I was reading the hints and general information last night and a lot of the information sounds like what I read as I prepared for my half marathons. I suppose I am preparing for a marathon of sorts. This helps since I know that I was able to complete two half marathons with my training and determination.

Hard to believe only 40.5 weeks until graduation

Sickness

Last week I was sick - hence the lack of postings. Last Monday I was not feeling good at all, Tuesday was much worse with me barely making it through the day. Wednesday I awoke to barely a voice. I even went to the doctor. That is pretty sick. Sinus infection. It was bad. Missed three days of work. I made it to work yesterday but the normal daily activities wore me out. I am still not at 100%. My focus now is to get to 100% and then focus on staying healthy. I plan to sleep 8 hours a night - this is an important one for me, eat my fruits and veggies, and do some form of exercise daily.

This week is a stressful one, but exciting.

Tuesday - Accounting Group meeting
Wednesday - my Sweetie's b-day
Thursday - Accounting Group Presentation - end of this horrible class
Friday - Family celebration for my Sweetie
Saturday - LAN party
Sunday - Marketing Group Meeting

I am counting the days until the end of the semester, 7 until everything is due, 9 until last class.

Then two wonderful weeks.

Best Wife Ever

That would be me. After I posted on Saturday I let my Sweetie sleep in as I prepared for a marathon weekend of homework. He woke up at about noon knowing he could play his FFXI game. I insisted that he get dressed and eat breakfast before beginning. Turns out that was good advice. He played for 29 hours straight. The only breaks he had involved quick trips to pick up lunch and dinner. Other than that, he played and played and played. I made sure to sleep in between papers and such, but not him. On Sunday I had a group meeting at noon. When I got back home at almost three, I really expected him to be asleep. NOPE, he was still going. At five he said he leveled enough - needed to get to 30 for a LAN party that I am giving him for his b-day (although I am not one of the people who play the game and it is not at my house). While he took a two hour nap to avoid screwing up his schedule too much I ordered pizza for his dinner. It arrived about 5 minutes after I woke him up.

Guess you can tell, I am a little crazy about this guy :-)

The Mailbox

So we come home after the concert and Amy's Icecream. We were feeling great. Due to work we were in two cars and my Sweetie stopped for at the mailbox on his way to the house. As we enter the house I asked him what we got in the mail.

He says calmly "something from those accounting people".

My heart stops. Is this the letter I am waiting for? He hands me two envelopes. Two, two has to be good right? I open the thinner envelope first, the one the size of the "we need more information" letters. To my surprise I read the first line "Congratulations! Your Application of Intent is approved". WOO HOOO The second envelop is my form to send in saying when I want to test for each section.

This means that I can test. for the CPA This means that they have all of my paperwork and approved of my education. This means that I have to take the next step.

In order to not stress over something that is not even there - I told myself that I could not think about when to study and test until I received the approval letter. Now it is here. It could not have come on a better day - after the Sarah Concert. However, I have 4 papers to write this weekend and cannot think about the CPA exam yet.

But I am so excited. I am so proud. I am so scared.

Sarah Was Perfect

Last night was the Sarah McLachlan concert. It was so wonerful. Butterfly Boucher opened and was really good. The lines were too long to purcahase her CD so I will investigate on-line. Sarah sang 9 songs from Afterglow and 10 from Mirrorball. There were about 3 or 4 that I did not know. And she sang Black Bird - I love that song.

This concert is not like a Madonna or any of the boy bands. There were no dancers or gimicks. She walked out on stage in jeans and a spaghetti strap tank top type shirt. Perfect! She looks great. We had great seats. And when we felt we needed more detail there were two large screens on either side of her. She was even wearing one of the yellow Lance Armstrong bracelets.

One thing that I loved was when she was on stage alone with a spot light and sang "You are my Sunshine" as the intro to "Hold On", which was Perfect. She talked to the audience with such ease - she is good at what she does. Everything was so perfect. Her band left the stage and I told my Sweetie to wait for an encore. He mumbled something about artists not doing encores anymore. Haha I was right. She came back out to sing like 5 or 6 songs. She just kept coming back on :-) The last time she came out all the equipment was in the process of being packed up so she took to the piano and finished from a song from Afterglow.

It was like I knew her. It is funny there is a friend of mine that is very confident and powerful. Sarah sounded just like her. We both were reminded of the dark Diva. I will have to tell her and hope it is not an insult :-)

I believe music is very important. It stimulate learning and encourages thinking in a way that a text book cannot. While I do not currently play an instrument - I do listen to music. However, I do not listen to music in the way of mindless on the radio. I am sure I am not the only one. Whenever I have a rough time in my life I turn to music - normally one artist - and completely embreace the albulm. It helps me deal with the issues. This has been true since I was in Junior High and Chicago helped me through a breakup.

I love Sarah McLachlan. However, I have not always been a die hard fan - heck I did not know about 4 songs last night. But her CD Mirrorball helped me through one of the roughest patches in my life. For that I will always be grateful to her and her music. I listened to this CD almost daily for a year. It was my therapy. And it was amazing to experience my therapy live. This has to be the best Valentines present from my Sweetie.

An Adult??

I have some time to kill before my class - so I thought I would jump on and enter some thoughts. Do any of you feel like an adult? Does being an adult feel the way you thought it would? I do not mean in meeting goals or where you thought you would be at this age. What I mean is simply the feeling. Sometimes I get hit with adultness - like all of the sudden it hits me that I am married and own a home. But over all I stil feel like a kid. Yes, I have more responsbilities. Perhaps it is because I am still in school - but not much else "feels" different.

This morning was one of those adult moments. My Sweetie was ready to go to work and he completely took me back - he was an adult. In his work clothes, phone on his belt, and briefcase bag, it seemed like he aged from 16 - 28 right in front on me. OK so that might be because he has aged right in front of me. But I am sure you all understand that feeling. I wonder if I will ever feel what I thouht I would as an adult. I have friends of all ages and even they don't seem like adults. Perhaps adultness is reserved for parents, grandparents and the like.

It is funny because I live not more than 4 miles from where I grew up, talk with my mom most days, am married to my highschool sweetheart, still have homework at night, and have an incredible urge to play video games. Perhaps I will never grow up completely because of so much that has stayed the same. Now is this so bad? I am the Queen of Fun - said by my 7 year old niece.

I have a real date planned tomorrow. We are going to see Sarah McLachlan!!!! I am going to make sure that I leave ALL stress behind for a wonderful evening.

Computer Issues

I am sitting here writing because I cannot get into the drive on the computer that holds all of my information that the auditors need. Fun.

Other than that, I am in a great mood. I was good yesterday again for a total of 2 phase one days. I tried the ricotta cheese dessert - maybe I made it wrong - but that was GROSS - I even spit it out. This week - even with everything that is due - is not stressing me out as much as normal. Of course I had my normal end of the semester nervous breakdown on Sunday - but I am doing better now. Everything will get done when it gets done.

The good news is that I show another loss from yesterday. I KNOW it is water weight and I don't expect to continue to lose at this rate, but it makes me feel good. Tonight is my MIL's b-day dinner. I am going to try my hardest to stay on phase one. We shall see.

Drive is back up - must get back to work.

A wonderful invention - the alarm!

So I wake up an hour late this morning. OK not quite an hour, in theory I had about 5 minutes to get ready and out of the house. My poor Sweetie woke up after he should have left. I apparently changed the alarm in my sleep. I remember changing it from 6 to 7, but not from 7 to 8. I might have hit the button twice. Needless to say - we woke up late. However, we were not stressed or bitchy to one another - like the normal situation with a messed up alarm time. We just moved a little faster and accepted our lateness. It was actually a nice morning.

But yesterday is the subject worth writing about. I RULE!!!! Three successes yesterday:

1) I was on phase one yesterday. On my way home from work I stopped at the drug store for my thyroid medicine. I went inside to get the prescription because I hate the drive through - not faster. Inside the store there are all kinds of bad things to eat and drink, and I was hungry. So I looked and found what I wanted - nuts and a flavored water (no calories) - and completed my purchase with my meds. YEAH ME!!!!
2) Went to the grocery store (no time on Sunday) and shopped the perimeter of the store. This allows for the least amount of processed foods. I bought healthy items for both me and my Sweetie.
3) This is the biggest one: went to dinner with friends. The good news is that we did not go to TexMex. This saved me on chips. We went to Applebee's and I had a salad. This salad was completely phase one except for some tortilla chip strips. I ordered my salad without the tortilla chip strips. I rarely have any changes to a meal - and most of the time it is adding something. Then everyone ordered dessert, even my Sweetie. I was so good. Not only was I full, which is a rare gage for dessert, but I simply did not want any. I did not have a bite. I was not upset about this or feel deprived. I walked out feeling strong and satisfied. I kept telling myself that I can always have something sweet on Wednesday or Friday. This was the biggest success because I can convince myself that it is a special occasion to eat badly - since we are out with friends. This was not the case. I ate for my health.

So yeah me!!

I bought a new scale on Sunday because mine was dying. It was great for the ego though. Get on get one weight, get on again and it would show an instant loss of .5, try a third time and see a loss of 1.5 within a minute.

Back to the grind

This weekend was nice. Only a few nervous breakdowns. I got my paper done in time for my Thursday class and I got the house cleaned in time for the party. All in all I was very productive. I also finished my Marketing homework by the end of Sunday. The party was nice and relaxing. We even played horseshoes.
 
The last time the family got together like this was back at the end of February for my SIL's 30th b-day. This was during the peak of my unhappiness at my last job. I could tell the difference in myself this time. That is a good thing. I enjoyed the food this weekend knowing that I would get back on track today.
 
I did have a break down yesterday. If you thought last week was bad here is the schedule for this week:
 
Wednesday - MIL's actual b-day will go to dinner to celebrate
Thursday - Last paper in Accounting due :-)
Friday - Sarah Concert
Saturday - Marketing Article due, Marketing Case due, Marketing discussion due
Sunday - my part of the accounting group project due
 
And somewhere in the week I need to figure when to work on my marketing group project. The semester has 24 days remaining - and counting.
 
After more pain with my knee this weekend and reading an article with Prevention about my knee problems, I made a decision. I am going to concentrate on my weight loss, walking, stretching, and weight lifting for the next 6 weeks. If after that I am still in pain, I will add on the physical therapy.
 
My goal is to complete phase one through my Sweetie's b-day. Allowing myself to go off for MIL's b-day and Sarah concert.
 
I am so tired. This semester is killing me. Worse than last semester, which sucked because of evil zombies at work. I am going to try and take a week off in between semesters. I think I will sleep the whole time :-)
 
It was so nice to see the out of town family this weekend. Really they are my in-laws. However, I have known them since I was 15, so I do not refer to them as such - and I do not have any aunts, uncles, or cousins of my own. 
 
I still have a little voice in my head telling me to train for motive. I know that I shouldn't because of my knee - but I would really like to get a couple more long distance "races" under my belt before mentoring. Speaking of which - I told TNT that I will not be able to mentor this season. They took it well, said they will miss me but appreciated the honesty.  I want to be ready next year to fully mentor. Of course the same voice that wants the motive walk this year wants the Motorola marathon in February - first year as Freescale.
 
OK I have rambled long enough. Back to work.
 
 

And I walk away with a blister

Yep - got one from walking all over down town with my sweetie. Meeting changed from lunch to an office meeting. Guess where they are located? Across the street from my Sweetie's office. So I went - parked at a meter and got up to the 18th floor just in time. Nice office - elevators have TV's.

The meeting was good. Felt confident. Very strange since I am not looking for a job. Bottom line is I said that I did not want to start until after graduation. Of course I am still scheduled to graduate in December and have through August 15th to decide, but we shall assume May - and that is what I said. I met the recruiter and she was very nice. Now I wait.

Sweetie was nice enough to go to TSBPA and drop of my notarized SSN and e-mail address today. Hopefully they have everything they need. Shhh - if I am completely eligible I "might" consider graduating in December. We shall see. Will cross that bridge when we get to it.

After the meeting went to Chipotle with my Sweetie. It was so nice to be that close to him during the day. Now I am back plugging away numbers for another Big 4 for the quarterly audit.

Nerves of Steel

OK maybe that is not true. I am not doing so well right now. Less stressed about the house work - my Sweetie cleaned the kitchen last night for me. We have cousins coming into town on Friday and that is making me happy. However, before then I must finish my paper due tomorrow, get annual reports for group project, and finish marketing papers for the week. Then of course there is the house work. AUGH!!!

I am nervous about lunch today. This is huge and I am trying very hard to convince myself otherwise. At 11:30 today I will be speaking with a partner of a Big 4!!! That is crazy. The more crazy thing is that I am not looking for another job. I really like my job and the people. Hell the pay and benefits are wonderful. However, I have always had a desire to go into audit. Too much to think about right now. I will go to the meeting and simply be myself. What happens, happens.

I will be so happy when this semester is over. I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown. So much to do in less than a month. I will survive, I always do. But I can't wait until the 2 week break. I am hoping to take one week off from work to completely relax. I really need it.

In case you didn't know - I rule

So yesterday I worked through lunch and until 6. However, the good news is that I completed the big awful report that I was working. In a nut shell - I am so cool. I did not get as much done as I wanted to last night. Spending 9 hours staring at excel manipulating numbers did not motivate me to go home and start it all over again with my accounting paper. Good news is that it is only 5 pages to write before Thursday.

I am leaving early today to get my SSN card notarized and off to the TSBPA. Hope this is the last thing I have to send.

I am so nervous about tomorrow. I need to come up with questions. Like I have time to research. Why did this meeting have to happen this week. Here is my schedule:

Thursday - Accounting Paper Due
Saturday - Marketing case paper due, discussion due, article paper due
Saturday - Accounting Group paper mostly due - at least need to have annual reports read and reviewed.
Saturday - Mother-in-law's b-day party.

UGH - yes still in a good mood and still stressed.

Trying to be very good on diet today. I am such a stress eater and that is not good. I have to figure other ways to deal. Why can't I have a desire to run when I am stressed?

OK back to work.

The Power of Socks

No this is not an ad for odor eaters. I am in a great mood today, actually I have been in more good moods than bad lately, even in spite of complete stress. See I bring you in with a great title and now you get to listen to my stress. Let's begin.

School:
Four papers due this week

Work:
First Close and Auditors arriving on Wednesday

Home:
Have to clean like a mad woman

Career:
I have a meeting with a PWC partner on Wednesday. Of course it is this week. Everything else is happening this week.

I am very stressed.

I am wearing jeans today that cover my socks completely. To help ease my stress I wore my Motive Bison socks. They are the socks that I received for completing my first half marathon last November. They are quite powerful.

I Feel Great

It is true. I have to confess to have Wendy's last night. After almost three perfect phase one days - I went to Wendy's for dinner. Was not good. The most important thing is that I am not allowing it to alter my day today. Tomorrow is my ma's b-day so I will have to go off then for cake.

Work is good. Came in on the Holiday and worked late last night. Hope that I am impressing. Unfortunately I am my own worst critic. Tonight is class which means a very long day. That is ok. I will survive. I am hitting burnout bad. In a nutshell that means I think I will NOT go on for my PhD.

Received a letter from the TSBPA saying that I need a copy of my ss card notarized and sent to them. That sucks. I sent an "approved" ID before. The worst thing is when I was contacted for my transcripts I was told that they had everything else. BLAH.

I need to call about physical therapy. Maybe I will do that today.

My Sweetie is the nicest and most loving man in the world. I forgot my lunch and vented to him about it. Was not upset about having to buy lunch but about the food going to waste as it was all cold items. All of the sudden I get an IM asking where I left it. When I said that it was on the counter and he said it was not there, I knew he drove all the way home to get me my lunch. I also suddenly had a fear that I did not forget my lunch after all. I walked down to my car - one flight of stairs down and two up to get to my car. Sure enough my lunch was in my backpack. I completely forgot because I NEVER put it in there. DUH. So I walk back the long walk to my desk to let him know that I had it the whole time and his surprise trip was a waste. He was not upset. His only response was "I wanted you to be happy". He is the greatest.

Support in Numbers

I like that. Not only because I believe that numbers are very important but the statement is true as well. Yesterday was very good on the diet. But the best part is that one of my great friends and my ma also began the diet yesterday. I think I will be more likely to stay on track knowing that someone I care about and respect is doing the plan with me. For those who do not know I am following the South Beach Diet

I still have not called regarding physical therapy. I am not looking forward to that part. I have been looking into gym memberships. We shall see. Also looking into the Total gym. It is supposed to be good for no-impact exercise as well as pilates. The only issue is where to put it. If only I could create a new room in my house.

I just need to get off of my butt and start my walking again. I don't think I will be able to mentor for Team in Training this year. Between school, work, knee rehab, and potentially CPA exams, I don't see how I have the time. As it is I just entered the busiest time of the semester and the time when I don't get to even see my friends often enough.

45 weeks until graduation.

A Wonderful Weekend

This weekend was wonderful. Friday night my Sweetie and I went to see Dodgeball. It was so funny. Saturday was productive with a trip to my Sweetie's parking garage at work to allow a tow truck to enter. Good news is that the cost is less than one thousand. Yeah. We finished the day watching the Lago Vista fireworks with friends. It was a very nice evening with many laughs. Sunday was the fourth and like most great holidays the family meets at my little home. It was a great day. Good food and good conversation.

I am ready to get my health and fitness regime in motion. The next holiday is on Friday with my ma's b-day. The good news is that she is also starting the same plan as me today - so we are going to enjoy ourselves but within limits. I can do this. I know I can. I am also entering the craziest time of my semester with large projects due weekly. I need my health in order to meet these many deadlines.

Foot for thought - in spite of my weight and lack of exercise routine - I can still put my big toe in my mouth :-)

Close Rush

I wanted to make sure that I logged on today and at least checked in. I work in accounting so our busiest time of the month is the beginning. There is a time period for closing out the previous month, quarter, or year depending on the situation. I am experiencing my first close in this position and it is hectic. It is also, my luck indeed, a quarter close as well as our testing for Sarbanes Oxley So there is a lot of pressure. I might have to come in this weekend. But you know what? That does not upset me like it would with other companies.

As far as the diet goes, I have been doing well. Because of holidays and such I am not making myself go on a strict phase one plan. I went to Chipotle today. YUM. I had the bowl and it was sooo good. I will have to tell my sweetie about it, he loves salads.

Here to a wonderful weekend that is fun and healthy.

The results are in

Yesterday I went to an Orthopedic Surgeon. This is the doctor that fixed my best friend's knee. So I trust him. I kidnapped my ma and we went together. Of course I overestimated the trip and we had time to eat lunch and then go to a couple of cool shops on Georgetown's square. It was fun.

I like the office building - it reminds me of camp with log cabins for offices. The wait was not terribly long and the people were very nice. The Dr lived up to my expectations of being a hottie. This is important :-)

He asked some questions and then moved my knee cap around and looked at my alignment. My knee hurt for hours after, but it was nothing that could be avoided. I really appreciate his up front personality. I even more appreciate that he is not a doctor who believes to cut now and repair later.

My fears did come true. I feared that the process would be long and the solution unclear. I should have gone to Vegas yesterday - I was right on.

The problem is that my knee and hip alignment are off. Short people have this problem even without injury. My injury made it worse. Another factor to cause the knee to move is weight.

This is the part that hit me the hardest. I know that I need to lose weight. The last doctor to look at my knee said that it was the weight - however, she did not explain why. The difference is that this time I was not put on a scale and he told me to lose weight. This means that I actually do appear heavy. Every other time it has been the doctor looking at my chart and then mentioning something. This was better in my brain. Yesterday hit me pretty hard - had a lot to think about.

The other very strange thing, I believe in signs and "meant to be's" is this doctor did not appear on my insurance list the first time I checked, but was there the second. I knew I had to go to him. After all he came so highly recommended. Then a couple of weekends ago I buy the South Beach Diet book and read it from cover to cover, completely on a whim. Well yesterday in the office as the doctor discussed weight loss he recommended the South Beach Diet to me. How strange is that? I just finished reading it. So I am doing it - on it today. Hoping for good signs.

Here is the summary of my plan:
~Lose weight
~Physical Therapy
~Have to wear in-soles in my shoes - no more sandals for awhile. Good thing I work in a casual office.
~Go back in 6 weeks - if these things don't help we will discuss more options.

So I have 6 weeks to do things correctly. I looked at what I have going on and planned my "off" days. Then last night my Sweetie and I went to dinner and I finished with ice-cream. How else do you start a new commitment?

I did not lose weight during my half marathon training because of my thyroid. The good news is that I have been on my medicine for a few months now and I am normal again. This means that I can work on losing weight any my body should agree with me and cooperate.

I am supposed to meet with Team In Training tonight about mentoring. However, with school, work, friends, and now knee treatment - I don't think I will have time. BLAH. I think I will still talk to my physical trainer and discuss the option for Motive Bison. However, I know that I might be told to lay low from long distance walking until the weight is gone. Will keep you updated.